Sound clips
Most of these sound clips have been included because they are commonly quoted lines from the movie, or they represent significant moments in the film. If you have a particular sound clip you would like included, contact us and we'll endeavor to add it to this section. |
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| Chapter 2 - College Plans |
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LAURA: Look at it, you see what he did to me?
CAROL: Get your head outta the light.
LAURA: There. Ow, it really hurts.
CAROL: Sweetheart, I can't say that I see anything. I'm sure it hurts.
LAURA: Well, mom. Then you need some glasses. I mean, at this point if I wanted to lie out, I could not wear a bathing suit.
CINDY: You know, exposing your skin to sunlight will make you old before your time, and eventually you'll look like an albino raisin.
LAURA: Thank you, Cindy.
CINDY: It's my pleasure. |
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LAURA: I have practically no feeling left in the upper part of my arm.
CLIFF: Drop it!
CINDY: You know, that suggests a circulatory problem. See, I'd put more fibre into my diet, and spend less time on the phone.
LAURA: Shut up, please.
CINDY: It's my pleasure. |
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LAURA: I wish just once, you guys could experience the humiliation of having the weirdest guy in a huge school, be a blood relative. |
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| Chapter 3 - Perfect Friend |
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WATTS: That's original, how long have you been pulling that one?
KEITH: Watts.
DUNCAN: How long have you been a lesbian?
WATTS: Excuse me?
DUNCAN: Well, I think...I think that you have a little bit too much up front to be a guy, so you must be a lesbian.
WATTS: I beg your pardon?
DUNCAN: You know, I think a little too much breastage here. |
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DUNCAN: Like, those were a gift...from...from your wife. |
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| Chapter 4 - Creatively Inclined |
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CLIFF: Hi honey.
LAURA: (screams) |
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| Chapter 5 - The Rich and The Beautiful |
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WATTS: Because she's beautiful right? Guys are so sickening. Really, it must be a drag to be a slave to male sex drive.
KEITH: I didn't say anything about sex.
WATTS: Oh, wanna start a book club with her? |
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WATTS: Don't go mistaking paradise for a pair of long legs. |
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WATTS: You couldn't score her in a million years. 'A', you're to shy and closed up to even approach her, and 'B', she'd kill you. Chicks like her have one thing on their mind, and you don't make enough of it to matter to her.
KEITH: You can't judge a book by its cover.
WATTS: Yeah, but you can tell how much it's gonna cost.
KEITH: Woah, that's deep.
WATTS: You want shallow, call Amanda Jones. |
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| Chapter 6 - Detention |
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KEITH: Is...is this detention?
DUNCAN: Actually, it's your mother's house, and we're all havin' a party. |
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WATTS: Amanda Jones doesn't know you, doesn't care about you. You're tryin' to jerk off the impossible. How many times do I have to listen to myself tell you this? I dunno, how many times? |
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KEITH: Do you know what kind of a guy Hardy is?
WATTS: Um, handsome, rich, muscular, popular, hot, happening, and capable of reducing your head to a crimson stain on the wall.
KEITH: Hardy's a jerk. He...He screws around on her, he treats her like dirt, he has no respect for her, he's just...
WATTS: And obviously she gets off on it. You're losing it, and when it's lost, all you are, is a loser. |
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KEITH: Hey, Watts, nothing ventured, nothing gained. Right?
WATTS: Keith, once a fool, always a fool. Right? |
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HOLLY: (laughs)
HOLLY: Are those boy's underpants?
WATTS: Yeah, so?
HOLLY: So, I've just never seen a girl wearing boy's underpants before.
WATTS: You ever seen a girl with a drumstick shoved up her nose?
HOLLY: Oh, is that some kind of threat?
WATTS: It's some kind of a warning.
HOLLY: I'm petrified, really. |
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| Chapter 7 - Asking Out Amanda |
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LAURA: This is not true. It can't be. This has got to be like the most hillarious rumor ever floated. Right?
CAROL: What are you talking about?
LAURA: Ok. I'm in town last night, I hear everybody talking about how Keith has asked this girl out.
CINDY: No way.
LAURA: Yeah, check it out. This girl is popular, she's beautiful, and obviously in the middle of some emotional shoot-out, to consent to date...the human Tater Tot. What did you do to her, Keith? Threaten her life? |
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CAROL: Is she nice?
LAURA: Mother, the girl is sex.
CINDY: For God's sakes, I'm eating. |
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CLIFF: Glad you got time to think about the girls. Between the girls and your art kick, you don't have time to think about anything important. I'll be dead 'n buried before you get off your butt, and apply to a college.
LAURA: Ease up, Dad. Any fool can get into a college. Only a precious few may say the same about Amanda Jones. Am I wrong? |
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DUNCAN: This is what my girlfriend would look like without skin. |
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DUNCAN: And while we're on the topic of the double breasted party machine, congratulations on your latest coup. Yeah.
KEITH: You know about Amanda Jones? How?
DUNCAN: You think I live here? I have a personal life too, man. How did you manage to swing that one?
KEITH: I dunno, Duncan. You know, I asked her out, she said yes.
DUNCAN: Anytime somebody from the outside lifts a woman from a guat like Jenns, man, we can all find cause to rejoice. I'm prouda you.
KEITH: Guat?
DUNCAN: A guat, man. Punch 'er apron one time for me, huh? |
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| Chapter 8 - A Ride Home |
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RAY: Do you want me to kiss you or feel you up or anything?
WATTS: You wanna die young? |
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RAY: You don't have a boyfriend do you?
WATTS: No.
RAY: See, a lot of guys I know think that you're...
WATTS: What?
RAY: Confused.
WATTS: Oh.
RAY: See, but I know it's just an act. Do you know how I know?
WATTS: Enlighten me.
RAY: 'Cause you radiate this sexual vibe. And if you wanted to, you could be a girl...like that! |
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WATTS: Ray, this is 1987. Did you know that a girl can be whatever she wants to be.
RAY: I know, my mom's a plumber.
WATTS: That explains a lot about you, Ray. |
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RAY: So, you gotta wait around an hour?
WATTS: If I want to.
RAY: Do you know how much damage we could do to each other in an hour?
WATTS: It's kind of a revolting thought, actually.
RAY: Really? What's revolting mean?
WATTS: Oh my God. Get your hands off me, man.
RAY: Does that mean you wanna come over? |
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LAURA: Hi guys, did you come by to see my brother?
SHAYNE: Oh my God. Um, what? No, I mean, we just dropped him home.
LAURA: And he told you we live here? He is so modest, it kills me. I...I suppose he didn't mention anything about our ancestoral estate in Scotland, or our apartment in Paris? So modest. |
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RAY: Look, how far are you going?
WATTS: The nearest Gas Station.
RAY: Oh, wonderful. How far's that, Russia or something?
WATTS: Don't worry about it, you're young.
RAY: Not anymore. Look, you'd better gimme your phone number after this. |
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| Chapter 9 - Hardy's Invitation |
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WATTS: Since when do your parents let you go clubbing on school nights?
KEITH: I'm waiting for Amanda.
WATTS: Here? She's coming here? On a school night? Did I miss something? Is there a new world order?
KEITH: Look, if you're gonna bug me and make me feel bad, can you do it later, please?
WATTS: She said she'd meet you here?
KEITH: Not in those words.
WATTS: In any words? |
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WATTS: She doesn't love you. It's a joke, it's all a joke.
KEITH: How do you know?
WATTS: I'd bet my hands on it. |
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WATTS: I've been thinking a lot lately about you and me. And I came to a conclusion that I didn't wanna deal with. But now that we talked, I can't hide it anymore. I think we'd get along much better, if we didn't spend so much time together anymore.
KEITH: Why?
WATTS: Because, I'm driving you crazy, and you're driving me crazy. And I'd rather not see you and have you think good things about me, than have you see me and hate me. 'Cause I can't afford to have you hate me, Keith. The only things I care about in this goddamn life, are me, and my drums, and you. Adios.
KEITH: Wait. Watts. Watts! |
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| Chapter 10 - Not Giving In |
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KEITH: I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I was so tough on you.
WATTS: Me too.
KEITH: You always hurt the ones you love.
WATTS: So, when are you beating the shit out of Amanda Jones?
KEITH: (laughs) |
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| Chapter 12 - College Funds |
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WATTS: Is it her body, or her face?
KEITH: Amanda? I dunno, it's...it's everything.
WATTS: My grandmother told me when I grew up, I'd have big boobs.
KEITH: Yeah? What happened?
WATTS: I dunno, I guess I just got lucky. |
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| Chapter 13 - Kissing Lesson |
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KEITH: Wait, wait wait wait, wait. How...how do you work on it?
WATTS: Pretend I'm a girl, ok? I mean... Pretend I'm her. Amanda. I know it's a big stretch, but try it. |
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KEITH: What? What?
WATTS: Lesson's over. You're cool.
KEITH: You're blushing.
WATTS: Yeah, right. The day I blush.
KEITH: No no no no, that was...that was very nice...you're pre...you're pretty.
WATTS: If this is how you repay a favour, I don't know if I'm rich enough to be your friend.
KEITH: No no, wait wait wait, I didn't mean anything. I'm sorry. Don't be mad, ok? I'll see ya tonight! |
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| Chapter 15 - Where's The Money, Keith? |
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CLIFF: Where's the fuckin' money, Keith? |
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KEITH: Dad, didn't you ever have guys at your school, that didn't fit in?
CLIFF: Yeah, of course.
KEITH: Yeah? Well, I'm one of those guys.
CLIFF: I thought things were goin' ok for ya?
KEITH: Yeah, well...I...I like art, I work in a gas station, my best friend's a tomboy. These things don't fly too well in the American High School. |
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CLIFF: Do me a favour will ya? Stop callin' me Clifford. |
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LAURA: Did he go ape shit?
KEITH: No.
LAURA: Really?
KEITH: Laura, I'm really in kinda a hurry now.
LAURA: Keith, I just came up to wish you luck tonight. Ok, I have all my friends crossing their fingers for you.
KEITH: Thank you.
LAURA: He really didn't go ape shit? He's probably saving it for me. You want me to lock up for you?
KEITH: Please. |
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| Chapter 16 - Chauffeured Date |
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WATTS: Gimme a break. Would you look at us.
KEITH: I think you look tremendous.
WATTS: It's too bad my grandmother bit the dust. She'd be very proud. I'm wearing a bra. |
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WATTS: Go get your skag, and lets roll. |
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AMANDA: Wow, check that out! Did you steal it?
KEITH: No, I borrowed it. See, I figured your ass was too precious for vinyl.
AMANDA: You're right. |
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AMANDA: So, do you always bring an extra girl when you go out?
KEITH: Well, I like to cover my bets.
AMANDA: That's very cute. I have to remember that. |
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WATTS: I'm gonna love this one. I can feel it already. |
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| Chapter 17 - Dinner For Two |
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CAR PARKER 1: What d'you say?
CAR PARKER 2: No way!
CAR PARKER 1: To win big you gotta do what?
CAR PARKER 2: Lose.
CAR PARKER 1: Lose big. What are we doing now?
CAR PARKERS: We're losing big. |
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WATTS: Double nickles. Ten the hard way. Oh!
CAR PARKERS: No!
WATTS: Mess with the bull, you get the horns! Ya know what I'm sayin'? |
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KEITH: Here, I brought you something to eat.
WATTS: A gift? For me?
KEITH: Yeah. I thought you might be hungry.
WATTS: Gee, thanks. Eating and driving, it's as handy as skiing, and doing your taxes.
KEITH: Well, maybe you can eat at the next stop.
WATTS: Could I book time to take a leak? |
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KEITH: Listen, you volunteered to do this. I was all prepared to drive, and you said 'no no no no I'll drive, so you guys can talk', remember?
WATTS: It was this morning, moron. Of course I remember.
KEITH: So, why're you giving me shit? |
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| Chapter 18 - Private Showing |
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WATTS: Break his heart, I break your face. |
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| Chapter 19 - Hollywood Bowl |
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AMANDA: So, what d'you see in me? Be honest.
KEITH: What d'you see in me? You first.
AMANDA: I don't think anybody ever thought anything about me, other than I looked good next to him. And I went along with it because I'd...I'd rather be next to somebody for the wrong reasons, than alone for the right ones.
KEITH: I'd rather be right.
AMANDA: You can stand being alone.
KEITH: Nobody can stand being alone. The minute you stop thinking there's someone out there for you, it's over, isn't it? Isn't it?
AMANDA: (I dunno.) |
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WATTS: I could beat the crap out of you, you won't last six seconds.
KEITH: I know what I'm doing.
WATTS: Don't go overboard, studley. |
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| Chapter 20 - Hardy Jenns' Party |
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DUNCAN: You know, I didn't know Jenns lived in a hen house? Did you know that? Jeez, it must be a hen house. 'Cause I don't see nothin' but chicken shit. |
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DUNCAN: Alright, man. Lets just cut the bullshit. Right? Please? I'm here to wipe the floor with your ass, and you know it, and everybody knows it, and you deserve it. I think it's safe to say, that this party is about to become, a historical fact. |
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DUNCAN: You guys go along, ok? We're just gonna stick around here, try to crank up this party to a nice respectable level. Ok?
KEITH: Ok.
DUNCAN: Don't worry, don't worry, we're not gonna mess 'im up. Not even gonna touch 'im. Just gonna make him cry, just a little bit. By just lookin' at 'im.
KEITH: Good night. |
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| Chapter 21 - For The Right Reasons |
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KEITH: I'm sorry. I didn't know.
WATTS: Yeah, well you're stupid. I always knew you were stupid.
KEITH: Why didn't you tell me?
WATTS: You never asked. |
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WATTS: I wanted these. I really wanted 'em.
KEITH: They're yours. You knew you were gonna get these.
WATTS: No, I didn't. I hoped.
KEITH: No...
WATTS: I didn't know.
KEITH: ...you knew.
WATTS: I had a feeling. Well, how do they look?
KEITH: You look good wearing my future. |
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